Click Schtick

A bunch of posts ago I told you about this new Clicky service which acts as both a super site meter and web analytical tool. So far, I've been very very impressed. The service, even in the free version, provides a wealth of information (how many visits, by whom, what they searched for that led them to your site, what they did once they got there, etc...) It is SO much better than the stats feature my web host provides, that I'm am definitely going to stick with it for now. The only issue I have with it (and it's a minor one, given that the service is free) is that sometimes it gets the site visitor's city wrong. For example, if I surf to this site from a location in Natick, MA, Clicky will often say that visitor was coming from Tyngsboro, MA - a city further north near the New Hampshire border. Such small discrepancies are common.

That's about the only issue, though, and if we assume that Clicky at least gets the general area of the visitor correct, that means I don't know who half of you crazies are - yeah, including you regular readers. However, I shan't let that dissuade me from throwin' out a few shout outs to all my peeps in da hizzouse. New Orleans, where you at? Awww yeah, they you at! Represent! Somerville, you up in here?!? Hell yeah, hell yeah. Who else? Errybody in San Jose gettin' tips... Alright, sorry. This juvie slang is gettin' old. But mad props go to my homies across the pond in Luton & Newcastle upon Tyne, anyway.

The list goes on and the locales are too numerous to list here. However, as I promised in that earlier post, I'll steal a page out of Sean's book and provide you with some of the more amusing search terms people have used to get to here. By far, the most popular search terms are "tattoo" (ironic, because I don't have one, but I wrote a post about 'em way back when), "ying yang", "mnah mnah" and "toppins" (lot of Mary Poppins fans out there I guess.) But popular search terms are boring. Here are the strange, funny and scary ones:

• dating a scientologist
• iq of the average bear
• bombs made with bathroom cleaner
• "houston is a shithole"
• no school lunch next week, I'm brown baggin it.
• drinking gunpowder
• Which TV quiz saw a duo linking five across while a solo contestant linked four down?
• early 90's annoying hum do doo do doo (that one cracks me up. It's as if the searcher thought Google would recognize the tune running through his head.)
• "i wanna rock right now, i'm rob bass and i came to get down"
• how did the bostonians get their accent
• "clip" + "devil" + temple OR Temptation + goat
• john hancock granary burial ground +missing hand
• Band members led zeppelin were clergy?
• looks like Shoney's Big Boy is just Big Boy now ... what happened
• knife skills boston massachusetts
• how to speak bostonese
• paddington bear uses the bathroom
• catchy + phrases + Anorexia
• "Who are people who have never been in my kitchen?"
• G is for George smothered under a rug.
• bathroom hygiene in the 1700's
• retarded nuh nuh nuh nuh sound effect

and my personal favorite....

• the worn-out murky hate

I'll leave it up to you to figure out my target demographic. But for now, I'd like to utter a hearty welcome to everyone, regardless of search term! You keep coming, I'll keep posting. Unless you're looking for more bathroom cleaner.

I Think, Therefore... I Think.

The jury is still out on this whole Clicky thing... or at least they don't have enough information to write a blog post about it yet. So far, this place has gotten a good number of hits, but in terms of people finding this blog via search engine... well, the results are decidedly more blah. A whopping two people found Murky Words as the result of a search. One person went searching for "ying-yang" and found my post from eons ago talking about tattoo's. The other person searched for "common noun plural english singular letter cartalk quiz" - and I'm not sure what they found, exactly. So, that's that. Could be worse - someone could have searched for "horny Boston leather gimp" and ended up here, in which case I'd have to cease all posts forthwith. Thankfully, that's not the case, but since I'm now out a reason to post, I figured it was time for another episode of my random thoughts.

¿Listo? Emmmmpieze.

• Bravely bold Sir Robin, rode forth from Camelot. He was not afraid to die, O brave Sir Robin! He was not at all afraid to be killed in nasty ways. Brave, brave, brave, brave Sir Robin!*
• Oscars are on tonight, but unfortunately, due to a previous engagement, I shan't be able to watch them. That's OK. I don't like the Academy anyway. I don't even know who the Academy are. Do they even exist? Who are these masked men, and why do their selections often suck? I call foul. Lying sacks of sh--. Why don't you vote on something worthwhile? Leave me alone.
• The sun's in my eyes! The SUN is IN my EYES! I feel like a mogwai. Bright Light! Bright Light! Bah. Screw it. I'm too lazy to move my computer. Guess I'll go blind while basking in it's rays.
• I've rediscovered grapefruit. Seriously, do you have any idea how good grapefruit are? I had one this morning for breakfast, and MAN, was it good. Thank YOU, Father Grapefruit, and thank you for letting us consume your children.
• I'm goin', I'm goin', I'm goin' back to NOLA. w00t!
• Perhaps I'm taking this whole personal finance thing a little too far. I actually clipped coupons this morning. You can just go ahead and start calling me Barbara Billingsley (oh, but pardon me stewardess, I speak jive.)
• He was not in the least bit scared to be mashed into a pulp, or to have his eyes gouged out, and his elbows broken; To have his kneecaps split, and his body burned away; And his limbs all hacked and mangled, brave Sir Robin!*
• My roommate is currently blackening catfish and using a mixture of spices that he created as a rub. Smells delicious, but Holy Smoke - literally! I'm coughing up a storm. And now, the fire alarm has just gone off. Perfect. Is this how they do it down south?
• Bought another cookbook! This time it's How To Cook Everything by Mark Bittman. I have a friend who really knows how to cook (she even knows how to sweat the aromatics) and SHE tells me that his books are worth every penny. I know, I know... I don't need to buy cookbooks when so many resources are available online (a la foodtv.com) but still, between Ted and Mark and foodtv, I'll be an Iron Chef in no time. So there. Wonder if this new book teaches you how to blacken catfish.
  
• I just did a load of laundry, and you know how sometimes you just have a bit too much for the dryer, so when you take the clothes out they're mostly dry but still slightly damp? Yeah, that's what just happened. Anyway, I hate that.
• Alright, I love my Red Sox and all, but this extended spring training coverage has gone a little too far. Somebody wake me when the regular season starts. Oh, and konichiwa, Matsuzaka-san!
• I'll be dining at The Cheesecake Factory tonight. Yummmm... Wonder what I should have? Maybe blackened catfish. *cough*
• I'll have a few hours to kill between the time I finish this blog post and the time I have to head out to dinner. Maybe I'll start 'Great Expectations.'
• Why are there braille instructions on drive through ATM's?
• Why are cartoon dogs so stupid? I mean, think about it. Astro, Scooby-Doo, Dino, Snively, Courage. They're all idiots. And not funny. Seriously, "Ro-Ray, Raggy! Oooh, Scrooby Snacks!" Who thinks that's funny? You? Get a life. Oh, wait. Mr. Peabody was pretty smart. Never mind, then. You're cool.
• Speaking of dogs, there's a rumor going around that Rolf from the Muppets is gay. Can't substantiate it one way or another, though.
• Q: How do you kill a circus? A: Go for the juggler. (Who the hell thinks that's funny? Me? Get a life.)
• His head smashed in and his heart cut out, and his liver removed, and his bowels unplugged, and his nostrils raped, and his bottom burned off, and his pen-*
  
• THAT'S quite enough, there. There's dirty work afoot!*

*Stolen from 'The Ballad of Sir Robin.' Music and lyrics by Monty Python.